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[personal profile] glass_icarus
There is no map for us.

Once upon a time, a nation that dreamed said to the world, "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore." So the people with yellow skin joined all the other dreaming people and crossed the ocean to a land without dragons, a land newly-minted and shining with hope and riches.

Or so they thought.

Once upon a time- no, that's not right. Once upon no time, the men and women who shared my skin toiled in a Land of Opportunity. They were coolies and construction workers, laundromat-owners, "comfort women" and mail-order brides. They lived- and died- in a place where people only saw in black and white, and they were neither white enough nor black enough to fit the citizens' perceptions. If their neighbors saw white as people and black as not-people, or vice versa, then the men and women who shared my skin were simply not: invisible, inaudible, ignored.

Years passed, and more of their fellows came from over the seas, and so the invisible ones turned their sight inward, toward their own. They made communities within their cities, crafting homes-away-from-home out of their loneliness, their bitterness, their exile. They worked hard to try to lift themselves out of the blue-collar class, despite the fact that no matter where they went or where they worked, no one saw them. They worked hard and swallowed their pride because things like family and duty could not be ignored, and if things like honor and respect and acknowledgment weren't attainable for their generation, perhaps they could be secured for their children, or for their children's children.

Thus was the "model minority."

Years passed, and their children came of age in a place where their faces were not. When they learned of dragons, they did not learn about the dragons of the east, but the dragons of the west. When they spoke in school, they did not speak the tongues of their parents, but the tongues of the strangers without their skin. Slowly and surely, despite the best efforts of their parents, these children lost their heritage and became something else, something new, something not of one world or the other. Slowly and surely, these children set their feet on different roads, ones outside the edges of all the maps, and began to walk forward, without compasses.

There is still no map for us.

Once upon no time, the men and women who shared my skin came to the shores of a land of many dreams. Some wanted to stay, and some wanted to return to their roots, but all of them dreamed of home.

-- written for the Remyth Project.

Date: 2009-01-31 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] riverlight.livejournal.com
Oh, this is powerful.

(I still haven't commented on your other post, but I'm going to—I just want to make sure I am as thoughtful as your post deserves!)

Do you know Joy Harjo's poetry at all? I feel like we might have talked about it—but perhaps not? In any case, she has a poem (http://www.poetryfoundation.org/archive/poem.html?id=179781) which this piece reminded me of. Not just for your line about maps, which she echoes, (though that too) but also because it seems like her poem shares this same feeling of—a story that echoes with pain? I'm not sure how to articulate it, but what you wrote immediately reminded me of that.

If you keep writing these pieces, I hope you keep posting them—I was really glad to get to read. Thanks.

Date: 2009-01-31 08:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
we have indeed spoken about Joy Harjo- i seem to remember talking about A Heaven of Blackbirds, among other things! :D (thank you, Yuletide, for introducing me to that poem.) in any case, thank you; i am kind of ridiculously flattered, and also glad that this story works for you. i've never been sure of the things that translate, cross-culturally, so. &hearts

Date: 2009-02-02 01:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] riverlight.livejournal.com
Oh, good, okay, I thought we might have, but—I hate to admit this, but it's totally true—I have a terrible memory, and honestly couldn't remember whether we had or not. I fail. :(

Yeah, I can see your point about things transferring, cross-culturally... I recently read a piece by a friend of mine who's Southern to my Northern, and it was startling, just how much didn't come across. I didn't really even get what she was going after.

Then again, part of that was her writing, maybe, and that's not a problem you have. :) ♥ right back!

Date: 2009-01-31 08:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whymzycal.livejournal.com
This is beautiful and, as [livejournal.com profile] riverlight says, powerful. And it gives someone like me a lot to think about.

Date: 2009-01-31 08:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! i was aiming for thought-provoking rather than accusatory, tone-wise. &hearts :)

Date: 2009-01-31 08:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whymzycal.livejournal.com
I think you succeeded admirably.

Something like feeling out-of-place, unwelcome, or adrift is universal, even if the causes and the depths of those feelings are completely different. So while I can't actually know what this experience is like (for either an individual or the group as a whole), I can get a sense of what some of it must feel like, and that makes me think all the more about how much I just don't know about other people's history and experiences.

There are so many gaps in our education (and when I say "our" I mean American public education, grades K-12 and even beyond) -- they're getting better, but unless I go out and find these things -- unless people like you share them with me -- I have no way of beginning to conceive of the gaps in my knowledge and understanding.

Date: 2009-02-01 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
ah hahaha, in the midst of our comment-spaz earlier, i managed to miss this one! *headdesk*

i can only hope that this is universal enough- the feeling of displacement or being on the outside is common to all of us, and so i thought it might be a good place to start from... otherwise there's a certain futility in sharing things that aren't relatable, you know? ;P

Date: 2009-02-01 04:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whymzycal.livejournal.com
It was an inspired choice. And you're absolutely right -- there is a certain futility in sharing experiences that others can't relate to in some small way or another. My students are going to love your stuff. Thanks again!

Date: 2009-01-31 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] magnetic-pole.livejournal.com
I'm reading this out loud to the better half, who's cheering you on. Thanks for a beautifully written and thoughtful piece. M.

Date: 2009-02-01 01:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! :"> i'm pleased this story works for you, though i tried to avoid the things that might get lost in translation.

Date: 2009-02-01 12:13 am (UTC)
such_heights: amy and rory looking at a pile of post (Default)
From: [personal profile] such_heights
This has been swirling around my head all day, but I've been trying and failing to work out quite how to comment. I think this is wonderfully articulate, beautifully told, and I'm so pleased and thankful you've shared it.

Date: 2009-02-01 01:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
&hearts i'm glad this story seems to be working, then! i was aiming for the introspective side of things rather than the angry side, as i find ranting to be... well, cathartic, but also largely unproductive. i don't want to make any of you guys feel defensive about Faily Things you aren't actually doing or saying, and besides, the Faily People i'd most like to yell at don't read this, and wouldn't get it anyway. *g*

Date: 2009-02-01 06:51 am (UTC)
ext_41195: (Default)
From: [identity profile] crooked.livejournal.com
this is fantastic, sweetheart! i took a sociology class once called the asian-american experience in america [and people ALWAYS looked at me like '... why? you're not asian.' when i told them about it], and this just really resonates with everything i learned in that course. i love it. thanks for sharing this! ♥

Date: 2009-02-01 02:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thanks! i'm glad it works for you.

Date: 2009-02-01 01:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luzdeestrellas.livejournal.com
This is wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing it.

Date: 2009-02-01 02:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! i'm glad it works for you. :)

Date: 2009-02-02 08:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kispexi2.livejournal.com
Another intensely thought-provoking post. I found this bit When they learned of dragons, they did not learn about the dragons of the east, but the dragons of the west. particularly poignant.

Date: 2009-02-02 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thanks! it's good to know which parts of it work for people. :)

Date: 2009-02-02 02:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] secretsolitaire.livejournal.com
This is a beautiful and thought-provoking essay. Thanks for sharing it.

Date: 2009-02-02 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! &hearts

Date: 2009-02-13 01:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] carmine-ink.livejournal.com
This is absolutely beautiful.
<3 And I say this as a half-Asian Canadian, too. Saving it to my computer.

Date: 2009-02-13 01:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! :) i'm glad you can relate to it.

Date: 2009-03-03 05:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joannindiw.livejournal.com
I have goosebumps. And tears. Thank you.

When they spoke in school, they did not speak the tongues of their parents, but the tongues of the strangers without their skin.

Yes, this. Only my parents scraped their skins and cut their tongues believing that would make us (I and my sibling) be *enough* to not be invisible.

ETA: (here via ciderpress)

Date: 2009-03-03 03:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thanks for the comment! :> i'm so glad this was relatable. and yeah, there are so many cultural pressures on us to be good and stay silent, which is just... not helpful to anyone.

Date: 2009-03-07 04:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wingstodust.livejournal.com
*.* This line.

Once upon no time, the men and women who shared my skin came to the shores of a land of many dreams. Some wanted to stay, and some wanted to return to their roots, but all of them dreamed of home.

Amazing. This resonates with me so much, my family being part of the Chinese Diaspora et all. Thank you so much for writing this. =D

Date: 2009-03-08 12:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! &hearts i'm glad it works for you.

Date: 2009-03-08 04:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] takenoko.livejournal.com
God, this made me cry.

perhaps they could be secured for their children, or for their children's children. - they were. They were.

Date: 2009-03-08 09:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thanks! i'm glad this spoke to you.

Date: 2009-03-20 10:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] harshita.livejournal.com
something not of one world or the other
This... just about stole my breath away. This is exactly how I feel, and how my parents feel about it me and it breaks my heart for all of us. Thank you for writing this.

Date: 2009-03-20 08:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thanks; i'm glad this spoke to you.

Date: 2009-03-21 11:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kelene.livejournal.com
You have just taken every little bit of shame and hope and something I can't even put words to that I've ever felt about my heritage and put it into the most beautifully written and expressive passage. I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes. ♥

Date: 2009-03-22 04:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
&hearts &hearts i'm glad this spoke to you!

Date: 2009-04-07 08:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rcloenen-ruiz.livejournal.com
I wept reading this. You've captured so well the way in which society refuses to see us. Thank you.

Date: 2009-04-07 02:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] glass-icarus.livejournal.com
thank you! i'm glad this was relatable for you. :>

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just another fork-tongued dragon lady

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