a collection of last nerves people have happily trodden past

[glass_icarus]

things white people do: unacceptable "social"/"flirtation" behaviors
[note for anyone wondering if these examples are hypothetical: THEY ARE NOT]

1. Gratuitous mangling usage of my presumed mother-tongue is an automatic FUCK YOU: not in the you're-getting-laid sense, but in the my-eyes-roll-forever-and-also-you're-getting-laid-OUT sense. Or at least, this is the case when you are talking at me.

2. So is getting in my personal space uninvited.

2a. So is touching my clothing, like for instance lifting the hem of my jacket to stare at my ass when I happen to be standing next to you in a bar. No, I do not care that you are drunk. No, I do not care that you are a lady- I am all for equal-opportunity ogling, but this is not okay coming from anyone.

2b. So is touching my hair. See previous no's.

2c. SO IS TOUCHING MY ASS. RAISE ALL PREVIOUS NO'S TO OH NO YOU DIDN'T.

3. SO IS FOLLOWING ME, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

4. At cultural events like, say, this fashion show, you being the "token white person" is not necessarily the plus you think it is. Especially if you introduce yourself as such. Even more especially if you lurk at the periphery of my conversations with other people- one girl and one guy in this case- and wait for the guy to go get a drink before you introduce yourself.

5. There is a 99% chance that asking me where I'm ~originally from~ will get you a LINEFACE DEATH GLARE. (Yes, even if you ask what my name is first. Also yes if you ask what my name is and then proceed to get it wrong.)

6. This does not give you license to ask me "Y SO SRS." Especially not in that particular tone, and while you are wearing a shit-eating grin.

7. Calling me by my presumed ethnicity/nationality? Never going to get you there.

8. Combinations of the above are going to get your ass ditched as publicly, coldly, and impolitely as I feel able to. Also, I will have no compunction about snarking at you, LOUDLY, directly behind your back- more because I don't want to see your face than because I can't or won't do it to your face. Nor will I have any compunction about warning all my friends about you and enacting a physical wall of shun whenever you approach.

In conclusion: HOME TRAINING, GET YOU SOME. >:E

Comments

[trinker]

BTW - did you get the memo? It's totes okay to trash on attractive women if you're a feminist, because any woman complaining about the kind of male attention she's getting is being lookist. Trufax!

Why Trinker is not a fan of random hookups:

Once upon a time, I was at a total meat market of a dance club, and got approached by two Middle Eastern Guys (Syrian, I think they were.) They went through like every single country in Asia except the one I was from. "ChiNA? KoreA? CambodiA? MalaysiA?" My friend, rolling her eyes, snarked, "Why don't you tell them where you're really from? She's from the Moon, guys!"

Would you believe they immediately shot back, "Oh, which city?"

Ohhhhh kay, den.

(They subjected her to the same crazy - "LibyA, Saudi ArabiA, AlgeriA?")

I think I'd rather die single than go back into the dating scrum again.

[lightstarangel]

Um. What in the everloving frak? PEOPLE ARE MORONS.

[glass_icarus]

It's totes okay to trash on attractive women if you're a feminist, because any woman complaining about the kind of male attention she's getting is being lookist. *HEADDESK* Right, because UNWANTED attention isn't a problem at all...

UGH. Yeah, people keep telling me "but dating's fun!!!" and I just go "...." a lot. (I feel that one's tolerance for bullshit can't be minimal for dating purposes!)

[glass_icarus]

._________. SERIOUSLY.

[glass_icarus]

-.-;;

[oyceter]

GAH WTF PPL?!

[glass_icarus]

IKR. @_____@

[escritoireazul]

That is some fucked up shit.

[glass_icarus]

Pretty much!

[summertea]

I LOVE THE "WHERE ARE YOU FROM" QUESTIONS.

"Where are you from?" "New Jersey." "No, but where are you originally from?" "... New Jersey." "Oh but where are your PARENTS from then?" "............."

[magnetic_pole]

Oh, boy. Each individually is bad, but together? Just awful. M.

[such_heights]

:DD Do it!

[such_heights]

Whaaaaat the fuck, ugh, I am so sorry people did these things to you!

Also, woah, what is with 2a? I mean, it's unfair to hold women to higher standards, because people in general are assholes. But given she's bound to have experienced that kind of crap herself, you do hope for better. :/

[woldy]

Sorry to hear you've been getting such a hard time. I've tried dealing with idiots like that by turning their stupid questions back on them e.g. "where are you from? No, I mean your ancestors, because unless they were Native American then by your own logic you aren't from here" but with most white people I have to be really, really blunt for them to get the point. Basically, some people are full of suck.

[unavee]

So appalling D: D: D: I'm sorry.

[mercredigirl]

Oh, my God. *sympathy*

The only time I've ever countenanced a 'So, where are you, your parents, you grandparents &c. from?' in a white country (because excuse me if telling you I'm Southeast Asian is not enough, I'm supposed to trace my family's history of immigration all through Malaysia and south China?) was at a gathering of Asian kids. (Which was awesome, too!)

I'm so sorry you had to go through all that! GRR.

[instantramen]

People'd have better manners if they were raised in a barn, I swear. *facepalm*

[vi]

WTF. >=||||||||

I'm sorry you had to deal with all that crap! And creeps, too. So with you on #8!

[timeasmymeasure]

So sad that I could check off a bunch here that's happened to me. I commiserate.

[glass_icarus]

I confess, sometimes I enjoy watching people dig themselves into holes attempting to rephrase that question! It's always... illuminating. xD

[glass_icarus]

At least these things were not all committed by the same person/on the same occasion! *g* I don't know what I would have done then.

&hearts

[fly_to_dawn]

SO MUCH DO NOT WANT D:

[glass_icarus]

IT MUST BE IN THE WATER OR SOMETHING!!!-- oh, wait.

Yeah, that's exactly why I was more nonplussed by the drunk lady than anything else; my reaction was more of a "seriously? SERIOUSLY??" Which is entirely different from my reaction to guys who do similar things (er, death glare/threat of physical retaliation... >.>).

[glass_icarus]

Hee, I plan to! &hearts

[glass_icarus]

Hee! Since my words tend to fall out of my head when confronted with perfect strangers, I end up falling back on pointed blank stares instead. I should figure something out for friends-of-friends, though, hm.

&hearts!